I like summer too

It's time for ice tweam

Well, today is an absolutely beautiful day and it's starting to feel like summer is on the way, even though it's only April. Nice. Thank you greater omnipotent power for sending us a lovely day. I might even be less than inclined to chuck myself out the window today. In honour of the sunshine here are my favourite things about summer, in no particular order of preference:

• Ice cream (or ice tweam as one of the little kids I used to teach called it.)

• Pints of Bulmers with ice, in a nice beer garden. Although now I live in London I might change my cider

• The smell of fresh cut grass ( cue Hothouse Flowers "Don't go...." etc)

• Sundays in the park with a book, a picnic and a boyfriend

• Festivals - YEAH F**KIN YEAH - seriously considering Bestival this year as won't be going home for the Electric Picnic

• Summer clothes - so much nicer than clunky winter ones

• Lots of fit muscles on display - Hey if the boys can have Tit Monday, the girls should have Pecs Monday
• Getting home from work when it's still bright
• A general air of optimism about the land

Feel free to add your own favourite things about summer.

Ta ta
xx

Dramaqueen

I'm blue la da di da do da

So this is how I'm feeling today: blue, uninspired, fed up and unfulfilled. What am I doing with my life? Is this as good as it gets? There has to be more to it surely. Or does everyone feel like this in the 21st century rat race? Would I be happier if I went off to live in a little cottage in the country where I could write my book, live in dungarees and eat home fattened rashers procured from piglets I reared with love. Why, I could make dandelion wine and nettle tea and loganberry jam and all manner of foul tasting but worthy delicacies.

Or is it just Monday morning? But surely one shouldn't absolutely dread coming into work every day. Surely that's not right?

Deep sigh, lament, wail

I want to ride my bicycle

Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Let's go ride our bikes!

(Copyright Wayne Jordan, HOA, Geronimo)

Seriously though, how did I cope for so long without a bike. It's changed the whole coming to work experience. Now don't get me wrong, I would still rather stick red hot pins in my eyes and a baseball bat up my rectum than come to work of a morning. But while the torture must be endured, it's a great way to get to the hell hole.

So far, I have only had one mildly hairy incident, from which I emerged unscathed, and have since learned to avoid lorries and bendy buses. The fuckers would run you over in a heart beat. Other than that my main issue is with helmet hair. But I dare say I'll get over that.

Now, let's go to the pub!

Things are never as bad as they seem

So anyway, I had this horrible dream last night. I dreamed that I had to go back to waitressing in some shit hole restaurant with burgers and badly made cocktails and all that rubbish, and it was horrible, truly horrible. I couldn't remember how to do anything and I got all flustered and messed everything up. And I woke up traumatised and then when I realised it was just a dream I was sooooooh relieved. It reminded me of just how sick of restuarants I was when I gave it up and I hope to the good Lord above that I never ever have to do it again. As crap as I feel at the moment, there's nothing worse than ill mannered pikeys, who don't know the difference between a knife and a fork, giving you grief cos you don't serve gravy with the chips and the only vodka you have is Finlandia, and not Smeernoff. God I fucking hated it. So here's to all the struggling actors/musicians/dancers/students and all round lost souls who work in the restaurants of the world. I feel your pain peoples! Oh and to the people who eat in them - don't forget to tip, it could have been you and it could be your kids one day. Toodle pip

Our new logo

check it out! we are a proper blog now!

The world is full of talented people

Now call me a big old softie but there is literally nothing that warms my heart as much as seeing talented people realise their potential and get a chance to shine. It's a tough life and no mistake and some people will spend their whole lives chasing a dream they can never catch. But hey at least they're in the race. And some people like these two (see pics) will get their opportunity after years of struggle (in Adam's case) and years of never having the courage to seize it (li'l old Susan Boyle).
Good for them. It just goes to show you should never ever ever give up hope because anything is possible.

Sigh.....Back to the torture that is these fucking ING Direct letters. Someone set me free. Pleeeeaaaaaaaaase.

What to eat for the rest of the week

So, tomorrow I'll be getting my braces tightened again. I am bored with mashed potato and soup. What else can I eat that requires swallowing only. Obvious crude jokes will not be appreciated.

Many thanks

Last nights vampire poo

twas good! thanks!

This blog is rubbish

G20 Poster idea

from http://www.flickr.com/photos/bobeightpop/3370710984

When is a blog not a blog?

Discuss

My anti recession idea

Copper River Valley

Lonely Peaks

Storm Ranger

Misty Moose In Danger At Wolf Camp

I'd like to give you all £100

April fools!

Victoria Sponge

Vampire P made the most amazing Victoria sponge! I had some for breakfast. IT WAS LUSH!!!!!!